Wednesday, April 21, 2010

it really sucks when you want to treat someone with a really nice gesture and just get kicked in the face. It sucks how in life you have to please everybody. It sucks how you keep your head held high, trying to protect the world from your true feelings because you dont want to worry or put other people out.
Im a person who strongly follows the "treat others how you want to be treated". And i know that quote can be taken many ways, and it is what mum tells me when Tysen and i fight, but i take it as it is; simple. It isn't hard to do nice things for people or go out of your way to see somebody smile. And although you ask for nothing in return, you still expect it. It is nice to recieve from time to time after giving. And what also sucks is having to defend yourself to people who you think have your back no matter what. What sucks is feeling so shit for trying to do something nice.
But am the type of person who will go out of their way to make somebody happy and feel special, and to also be original. But sometimes i think "why bother?". Is it worth it? Sometimes i think "what is the point? Time and Time again with different people and different types of people you try and do nice things and you still get the same result".
Does it mean i should just stop trying, or keep trying because one day you will get the outcome you so desperately want.
I dont know. I dont know about a lot of things anymore, but on thing i know is that i will no longer put myself out there again to do something nice for people, even those you know and love because you never know the shit people can throw back in your face...

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